Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Birthin' Babies

Kev and I got up early for some IHOP the morning I was induced. I ordered some healthy harvest pancakes with bananas on top and drank decaf coffee. Kev got the breakfast sampler and ordered his coffee fully loaded. We joked all through breakfast about how this was our last meal.

At the hospital, the paperwork was quick and easy. They had me in one of those a-modest gowns before I was emotionally ready. Kev and I watched a little morning news before the family started showing up.

At 8:30am someone came in and gave me a little pill to start the induction. I was dilated 1cm at that point. The pill worked. I started having contractions right away....they were 2 minutes apart and didn't hurt a bit. I started making jokes about having a defective uterus that wouldn't allow me to be in pain during contractions....that was very wishful thinking, folks.

A little after 2:00pm I was dilated 3cm and so they decided to break my water. I was really nervous about this part, because I read that they use a hook. A HOOK, folks. INSIDE. Amazingly it didn't hurt a bit....didn't feel it at all. I did feel my water break, though. It was warm.

I should have asked for my epidural at this point. My contractions were starting to hurt a little bit, but I thought I'd try and wait it out a bit.

At 3:00pm the Ellen show came on, and before she could dance with the audience, I was in some pretty good pain. I called for the epidural and laid back with my eyes closed, concentrating on my breathing. The anesthesiologist will be here any minute, I kept telling myself. About an hour and a half later, my contractions were so bad that I wasn't really mentally present in the room anymore. The only thing I could do was breathe, and I wasn't doing that very well. Mom and Kevin took turns rubbing the base of my spine as I white-knuckled the side of the hospital bed.

4:45pm rolled around and I began to lose control of my body. I experienced something similar in college. I stole second base twice in our game against the Henderson Reddies and had a palm-sized raw place under my right knee to show for it. It was pretty nasty and oozed for a long time. To clean it, I would pour alcohol on it. Well, I did that once. It was such a maddening, hair-ripping pain, that I could not bring myself to pour that little capful of liquid fire on my wound more than once. But, I knew it needed to be cleaned, and so I made one of the boys from the basement come up and do it for me. The contractions I felt at that point reminded me of that pain, except worse..... My controlled breathing was no more. I was gasping and trying to hee-hee-hoo, but it was impossible. I managed to say to the nurse, "I think I need to push now." They say when it's time, it feels like you need to poo. They're right. The nurse panicked a bit and checked me. I was fully dilated without that stupid epidural. This was not the plan.

About 15 minutes later, the blasted doctor came and gave me the epidural. A little late now, Doc, I wanted to yell, but it's hard to yell when you can't breathe. He stuck me in the spine, which didn't hurt at all compared to the hell I was experiencing, and I immediately began losing feeling in my lower half. The contractions lessened, but they still hurt. They let me rest for a while, and let the epidural do it's thang, and then it was time to push. And push I did.....for 14 minutes. They brought me a mirror, because I wanted to see, and I pushed that little girl right out. It was blessedly quick, an explosion of baby, really. Don't think I'm lucky....I'm paying for it now in stitches and a busted eye vessel. She was born at 5:28pm.

Reagan Michaela Crow
Born 4/28/09
Weight: 8.5 lbs
Length: 20 inches